We at Crockatt & Powell recognise the importance of traditions and the role they play in all our lives.
So it is with great pleasure that I now relate this feat of outstanding blaggery performed by our esteemed colleague Stuart.
It all started at about 6pm when I overheard a telephone conversation Stuart was having with a friend.
"The Lyceum. Yeah. Herodotus, yeah. But the Thucydides was more difficult - I could only get it in paperback."
"Great conversation Stuart, I loved the progress from pub to culture." I said.
But it went further than that. On the floor of the Lyceum Stuart and his mate found an invite to the Guardian Christmas party. An opportunity for a blag. Well, tradition has it that such opportunities must be taken. They turn up, brandish the invite "Yeah, we write for the Guardian" and leap hurdle one.
Hurdle two asked for security passes.
"Oh, we lost them in the pub" says Stuart.
"Oh don't worry" says the cheery bouncer "Your names will be on the list."
At this point our man confessed to losing his bottle. He froze.
"Er, we found the invite on the floor in the pub" says Stuart's mate.
"I live just round the corner" was all our man could come up with.
"Guys, you are really going to have to work on your excuses" says the bouncer and LET THEM IN...
To a world with not one free bar, not two free bars, not three free bars but FOUR free bars.
"At first we were after beer, then champagne then we thought "why not whisky?" and by the end we were like "A mochito? Why not?"
Sadly the chaps lost focus to such a degree they were not able to tell us anything else about the party.
"There was a Northern Soul room" were Stuart's final words on the matter.