You all know how hard it is running an independent bookshop these days, that they are all dead and if not dead then probably dying?
Well reports are coming in that Crockatt & Powell in Waterloo are managing just fine thanks. This is "impossible" and so we must conclude that the people running it, the people shopping in it, the people coming to events in it are all dead too and that the Zombie shop has become a meeting place for fellow Zombies.
Some of them even (whisper it!) even claim to love books and reading...
Cool - well you'll want to be stocking up on David Wellington's fabulous Zombie series! 9781905005475, 482 and 499 (yes, I do know all my ISBNs off by heart).
ReplyDeleteWell they do say that Zombies like BRAINS... BRAINS... as do most serious readers, albeit not in quite the same way.
ReplyDeleteIt's sad that the zombies were unable to continue to roam in the bookshop in West London.
ReplyDeleteApparently their chief, David MacZombie said. 'I'm afraid the difficult mating conditions for zombies we are all experiencing, have made it impossible for the shop to continue. We just haven't had the hunger for human flesh to enable us to compete in our high street location."
Keep it up Matthew.
S
"Keep it up Matthew"
ReplyDeleteArgh! Not you as well Simon and Tim...
THe first e-mail of the day claimed YOUR PENIS CAN MAKE MORE SHADOW THAN A TREE
Who responds to these things? Can you imagine the trouble that having a penis the size of a tree could cause?
Depends on the angle of the sun and the size of the tree.
ReplyDeleteGod Marie, you are so fuc*ing clever! No wonder you are a bestselling author now...
ReplyDeleteI'm having visions of all those Bonzai boys. Probably the types that refuse to give up their seats to pregnant women on the tube etc.