Thursday, August 17, 2006

Finn Visits The UN and Achieves World Peace Through the Simple Yet Effective Manipulation of his Face

Please note: No infants were intoxicated in the construction of this e-card sent to my sis in NZ...

Another dreamy day began in South London. The birds were singing outside in the gentle August drizzle, fighting for natural sound against the pneumatic drills of a group of workmen contracted to dig up the street. The cat was chewing catnip and waiting for the mice to make a wrong move so he could have some breakfast. Dad was drinking coffee and mum was doing a crossword.

Meanwhile Finn, small yet heroic, was bouncing in his bouncy chair and contemplating the possibility of world changing action...

...before anyone could react he had leapt a thousand miles or so (startling an albatross mid-atlantic) and landed in the UN building in New York where world leaders had gathered to discuss a new resolution.

Mr Bush was speaking about the need for "credible action" in the face of "terror".

Around the table other world leaders were nodding or shaking their heads. It seemed that another war was inevitable in the quest for peace. As usual everybody had a different analysis and what was even more familiar - all these wise men thought they were right.

Finn wriggled at the back. Oh dear. You know what's coming don't you?

An ALMIGHTY fart! Pong and awe! The mother of all air biscuits!

What was worse someone had left a microphone lying around so the cacophony was broadcast at high volume into the ear pieces of all the assembled diplomatic and state representing folk.


Everybody stopped talking, listening, nodding (or shaking) their heads and turned to stare at our diminuative darling.

And what did Finn do?

He smiled.

He smiled and the leaders were confounded.

Their words of war melted in the face of such a lovely spectacle.

Suddenly going to war didn't seem such a good idea. After all we all were little once. Before the demands of society made us sensible and forced us to get jobs etc we idled the days away, smiling and farting.

In an instant World Peace was declared.

Finn leapt off to the Empire State. With another, rather overenthusiastic, bound he landed in Moscow before jumping back to Camberwell.

Nobody even noticed he had gone.


  1. When my daughter was around 5 she had a best friend called Milly Mitchell. She and MM never ever ever fell out but if they had spent a whole day together, as they often did, by 5.30 they might begin to get a little tetchy, so I always dumped them in the bath. Lots of Matey and they were happy as sandgirls for another hour - just needing the occasional top-up to re-warm the water. And one day MM`s Mummy came to collect her, looked at them sitting squeezing sponges over one another`s heads and said 'If all the World Leaders had had enough Water Play as children they wouldn`t want to make war at all.'
    I agree.
    Finn does too.

  2. Ahhh Matey - I remember Matey...

    Never keen on baths though.