Hiccup Down Babylon - The Further Exploits of the Recently Arrived One Known As Finn

Finn woke up with a start. Things were not cool. Despite the small size and relative lack of sophistication in our young hero's brain he had finally worked it out. The world was not all fluffy and full of smiley people like mum (and sometimes dad) there was bad stuff too. Really bad stuff. Stuff that was so terrible he felt like crying right about now.

So he did.

A while later, as dad collapsed frazzled onto the sofa, groaning and tearing out the remains of his thinning hair, Finn resolved to SORT IT.

A quick suck on the thumb (Legend has it Finn once burned his thumb on the recently removed from the fire body of the Salmon of Knowledge and now thumb sucking resulted in future seeing etc) provided a solution to the problem of evil in the world.

Hiccups.

Lots of hiccups.

A short while later he began:

Dark Satanic Mills were destroyed in a flurry of mouth flatulence to be replaced with idyllic workers co-operatives like Crockatt & Powell. (!)

Nasty words between lovers were mangled and returned as whispered sweet nothings.

Death had his cloak pinched and sythe blunted - but then returned as all good necronaughts know - Death is a part of Life.

Bombs became buns, missiles meringues, soldiers students and tanks turned into trees.

After an hour or two the world was a better place.

Finn woke up with a start.