Hello there young baby crockatt! Looking forward to making your aquaintance.
It's at times like these when we turn our thoughts to all the good things in life, all the joys and miracles and all the things we can teach young Finn as he finds his way in this crazy world.
We have to teach him of the kindness of people, of generosity and spirit. We have to let him know that depite all the horrors Finn will see as he grows up that we are basically good and that love will prevail. With one important exception...
When being abused by a 6ft 5in eye-tie defender it is perfectly acceptable to headbutt him in the chest as hard as you possibly can. Yes! Get in there my son! Zizou, c'est magnifique!
(I think I might be alone in my admiration for Zidane's extraordinary act of violence but to me it wasn't the petulant act of a dilettante Rooney but the result of 20 years of abuse, much of it rascist. It was the last act of defiance of an extraordinary career. Not for Zidane the pathetic ignominy of defeat on penalties and a quiet sloping off into the Berlin night. No, he'd had enough and he wasn't going to take it anymore. There's more psychology and drama in this one moment than in any number of world cups.)
Sorry Finn, don't listen to me, I'm a bad person. Listen to your Mum and Dad, they're much nicer.
Once again, welcome to our world.