Tuesday, October 30, 2007

It's Back!

Yes, the Magna Farta itself, Roger's Profanisaurus, the World's Sweariest Dictionary has returned. Now with over 10,000 rude words and phrases. A brief and random selection follow. Please do not read on if easily offended by blokeish juvenilia.

asbopolis n. - A claimant-rich conurbation such as Liverpool or Manchester, which boasts a vibrant youthful culture of non-conformist behaviour.

budgie smugglers n. - Extremely tight gentleman's bathing trunks. Noodle benders.

Choreplay n. - Tiresome pre-sex ritual required by selfish women. Frigmarole.

Dowsing Rod n. - A piece of wood that involuntarily twitches when approaching an area of great wetness.

Full Nelson n. - When wrestling oneself, a hold involving one hand, one eye and a funny shaped hat.

gash mark six n. - A state of arousal in ladies. 'A ladies hairy oven must be heated to gash mark six before the gentleman slams in his lamb.' (from Bedroom Management by Mrs. Beaton)

high speed rinse n. - An act of self pollution committed in the shower. Flinging in the rain.

Indian rope trick n. - An impressive erection attained under seemingly impossible circumstances, eg. after twelve pints and/or six wanks.

J-t tomorrow. (Maybe)

(Words in italics are for cross-referencing but you'll have to buy the book for that - £8.99 - Bargain of the Century)


  1. Well, you're already in the dawghouse anyway these days...(is that word in the book?)

    keep locking yourself in...

    Choreplay, indeed.


  2. 'Please do not read on if easily offended by blokeish juvenilia'

    T, whoever you are? If you're not going to read all of the post then you shouldn't really comment should you? Be polite now, eh?

    And 'dawghouse' is far too lazy and ugly a word to merit even a passing rejection from the creators of this work of vernacular genius.

  3. I like "frigmarole" best.

  4. that disclaimer is just a little pink flag, helping us to get through the boredom of the day

    and it's always nice being offended by you

    yes, rub it in, I'm non-literwawy (my tooth just fell out - true!)

    and I dont' care (sulk): you're still in the dawghouse...

    T :)
    (figure it out yet??)