It happens very rarely but when it does it's palpable. There are people that we (or maybe it's just 'I') meet that we take such an instant and irreparable hatred for. It's almost like a chemical reaction where the person standing in front of you is acting like some sort of catalyst for the nasty, primeval visciousness that lies buried at the base of the brain. And there's nothing you can do about it. This person was in yesterday and back in today and all I can think about when he's condescendingly droning on is Kathleen Turner in the 1989 movie, The War of the Roses:
'When I watch you eat. When I see you asleep. When I look at you lately, I just want to smash your face in.'
Normally I'm very calm, honest. Please don't let that put you off visiting C&P...
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Adam!
ReplyDeleteyou've got feet of clay....
I think we're just a bit tired...
ReplyDeleteLast night we had some twat try to deliver us a pizza. He didn't just have the wrong house, he was on the wrong street. It was past 10pm and my wife started trying to explain where he needed to go etc - out storms crazy man Matthew to yell and swear at the bloke who backed off pretty quickly. I then had to apologise to Mary for yelling at her to "Get inside NOW!"
Should manage a lie down this weekend after which normal service should be resumed.
Harry Potter hotly followed by Marie = two frazzled booksellers!
Hi Adam - we just had someone in who was offering to arrange a hot oil massage for you! (She was worried about you after reading this blog entry - will we ever learn to be careful what we say on here?)
ReplyDeleteAll above board she assures me...Very pretty girls...but they only massage men who have been referred by existing female clients.
From head to waste and then below the knee. The "mid-section" is covered in towels. Heavy towels.
Are you up for it?
I don't think I'd like to massage Adam's waste.
ReplyDeleteFor heaven's sake Matthew- is no conversation private in C&P??!!
ReplyDeleteMassage offer is now withdrawn. And it was for real: the salon even has a new-father-de-stress one!
I'll visit the shop when my sulk is over.
Join the club. I'm still sulking over Marie's comments.
ReplyDeleteI dunno, someone becomes a bigshot author and they think they can go around insulting people!
Actually I was insulting Matthew's spelling so really it should be him who is sulking... (I have no issues with your *waist*.)
ReplyDeleteOh dear - foot in mouth strikes at C & P again...
ReplyDeleteAnd I won't be speaking to that spell checker again - such a false friend...
But I refuse to sulk - I'm off on holiday on Thursday hooray!